# Date Me! Original: https://swyx.io/date-me Published: 2025-01-02 > if you like me, and you're interested but never thought to ask, just ask! if you like me*, and you're interested but never thought to ask, just ask! > The always live version of this is on https://swyx.notion.site/dateme just because the design is nicer/more familiar to folks. People also REALLY liked the comments I made. *or know someone who might --- Hi! I’m swyx and I dislike dating apps but want to take relationships seriously… so here’s my attempt at opting out of the system! Here’s the basic “what everyone asks” from dating apps: - 38yo Singaporean Chinese, 5’ 7’’ (171cm) - Live in San Francisco/often in [[Singapore](https://www.swyx.io/sg-guide)](https://www.swyx.io/sg-guide) (but open to travel/moving to other major cities) - never married/no kids (want 26-40yo woman to marry and have kids) - **techie** (but not 100% techbro tho I have [[been a software engineer](https://hackernoon.com/no-zero-days-my-path-from-code-newbie-to-full-stack-developer-in-12-months-214122a8948f)](https://hackernoon.com/no-zero-days-my-path-from-code-newbie-to-full-stack-developer-in-12-months-214122a8948f) and do have a [[podcast](https://www.latent.space/podcast)](https://www.latent.space/podcast)) - **singer** (I’ve been in [[musicals](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mamma_Mia!_(musical))](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mamma_Mia!_(musical)), [[acapella](https://www.pennchants.com/)](https://www.pennchants.com/), tiktok, teeny bit of guitar. When I’m home there should always be something playing on the speakers, no exceptions!) - **writer** (people like my [[blog](https://swyx.io/LIP)](https://swyx.io/LIP) and [[book](https://learninpublic.org/)](https://learninpublic.org/) and [[short stories](https://x.com/swyx/status/1774291917091868971)](https://x.com/swyx/status/1774291917091868971) and [[newsletter](https://latent.space/)](https://latent.space/) and [[communities](https://x.com/swyx)](https://x.com/swyx)) - **friendly, ambitious nerd** (I sometimes run [[giant meetups](https://www.latent.space/i/115665083/)](https://www.latent.space/i/115665083/) and [[conferences](https://www.ai.engineer/worldsfair)](https://www.ai.engineer/worldsfair)) - Obsessions: [[Dropout.tv](http://dropout.tv/)](http://Dropout.tv), [[Coupling](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coupling_(British_TV_series))](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coupling_(British_TV_series)), [[bouldering](https://www.swyx.io/bouldering)](https://www.swyx.io/bouldering), Discworld, Powerful movies, [[good podcasts](https://swyx.io/fave-podcasts)](https://swyx.io/fave-podcasts). Have had both dogs and cats but don’t currently have any, would love to - Not very religious but raised in Buddhist tradition and generally think karma is real - Social drinker, never smoked, regular exercise (have I mentioned I like [[bouldering](https://www.swyx.io/bouldering)](https://www.swyx.io/bouldering)) ## Obligatory photo wall ![image](https://github.com/user-attachments/assets/b436adc9-d71f-435b-a4d8-676be7f7a400) ## About The basic non-professional [[about page](https://www.swyx.io/about)](https://www.swyx.io/about)/[[linkedin](https://www.linkedin.com/in/shawnswyxwang/)](https://www.linkedin.com/in/shawnswyxwang/) gist is that I’ve grown up constantly straddling two worlds: - spending half my life in Singapore and the other half in the US; - spending half my career in finance (Wharton→UChicago→options trader→hedge fund) and then [[pivoting to tech](https://hackernoon.com/no-zero-days-my-path-from-code-newbie-to-full-stack-developer-in-12-months-214122a8948f)](https://hackernoon.com/no-zero-days-my-path-from-code-newbie-to-full-stack-developer-in-12-months-214122a8948f) for the second half (Two Sigma, AWS, 3 unicorn startups) - being both very online and yet loving building IRL community. The plus is I adapt/fit in easily, the downside is I have switched countries, cities, and social circles so much that my personal/social life isn’t where I want it to be — 3 serious relationships but always cut short basically by long distance due to work stuff. I think those days are done and I’ve “found my thing”, and am in a place where I want to seriously work towards being a life partner to someone who’s also ready for that! I get shy writing about myself but I’m forcing myself to in this new year so here are some other dating profile notes: - Values: Commitment, Connection, Honesty, Vulnerability, Communication - Personality: Authentic, Empathetic, Passionate, Smart, Sociable - Interests: Climbing, Running, Tennis, EDM (Tiesto), Soul (super random but I won a contest for #1 Joss Stone fan in 2006 haha), Podcasts, Karaoke, traveling for friends instead of museums, Great TV/movie writing ## What I’m looking for - **Do I have a type?** - Physically: Genuinely attracted to all races, and a wide range of body types, but yes historically have mostly dated Asian girls - Personality: Trustworthy/Funny/Low drama/Easy going/Spontaneous/Responsible. Smart-but-it’s-not-your-entire-identity. Tenacity/Grittiness/Creativity is hot as hell! - Giant pluses: - Musician - Singer, Pianist, Arranger/Composer, anything. We will make all the music - Career in Healthcare/Law/traditional businesses - I gotchu on finance/tech (but finance/tech is cool too of course) but it’d be nice to balance that out - zero issues at all with you making more than me if thats still a thing people get hung up on - Writer - probably the easiest tell of a beautiful mind - Cooking - I would LOVE to be your sous chef - Dancer - Mama said I was a dancer before I was born; I used to once, I don’t anymore; would love to get back into it without doing the creepy do-dance-classes-to-find-dates thing that so many guys seem to do? - Better memory/aesthetic sense than me? :) - Open to living at least part time in Singapore - I do want spend time with my family ## hit me up! if you’re pickin’ up what i’m puttin’ down, find me on text or [[twitter](https://x.com/swyx)](https://x.com/swyx) or [[email](mailto shawnthe1 at gmail.com)! I like “can’t lose” first dates - a walk/hike, farmer’s market, [[dog rescue cuddles](https://muttville.org/)](https://muttville.org/)! Coffee is good but I’m 100% a tea guy.